I Shouldn’t Complain

So, I realize I often complain about my kids. They are mischievous, busy and sometime illogical. However, tonight I was reminded that they most difficult aspects, particularly of Ava’s personality, are perhaps the trade-off for a great strength. She wants and explanation, and can be purely illogical if she thinks she deserves one and doesn’t get it. However, when given an honest and real explanation, she can drop a subject on a dime, accepting the logic in the answer she was given. She wants to be independent and bossy, which leads us to great conflicts at times. However, it’s a great help in protecting her brother, as I’ve been notified on numerous occasions of his proximity to danger through her warnings to him.  She loves a challenge — her competitive spirit can cause her to stand her ground in an argument, but it can also make her hop into her car seat in an attempt to “beat me” as I run around the van to strap her in. She desperately wants approval, which makes it so, so hard for her to take punishment graciously. Yet I think that same desire causes her to watch and listen closely to directions and examples, creating a small child who really is quite good at a lot of things.

What brings this train of thought around the track right now? Well, at about 10:00 tonight, Jake & I heard the bathroom door close. Then we heard the toilet lid open, and, well, you get the idea. Not a peep from her as she did her business and then quietly crawled back into bed. No big deal, until you realize that she’s only 3. Not only did she wake herself up to use the restroom, she had the presence of (foggy) mind to complete the task. Crawling back into bed was just icing on the cake for us. I have never posted a Facebook status that said, “My child wet her bed AGAIN.” I have complained about her “holding it” too long and trying to be too independent. I’ve been irritated by her need for a “wet napkin” and her abhorrence of anything sticky on herself. Perhaps I’d do better to focus on the positive side of her attributes. After all, I have a sinking feeling we might not make it to 3 1/2 with less than 10 wet beds from her brother. . . He’ll probably laugh and laugh as he splashes around in his wet sheets. And he certainly doesn’t seem to care about being dirty.

After all, “Stubbornness is also determination. It’s simply a matter of shifting from ‘won’t power’ to ‘will power’.” – Peter McWilliams

You want a WHAT?

“Mom, I want a beer.”

Shocked, I looked up at my daughter. “A WHAT?” I ask.

“A beer.”

I looked at my 13-year-old nephew, who was making cookies, and asked, “Did she say ‘beer’?”

He agreed that he heard the same thing, and my mind frantically raced as to where she might have heard this. I’ve never had a beer in my life, and, although a cocktail is semi-pleasant for me in the right situation, I never really crave alcohol in any form. My mind raced through the various media she’s exposed to. Videos about beer — don’t think so. Magazines where she would have made the connection — pretty sure not.  We sometimes play country music, which mentions it, but I didn’t think she’d get that out of the music. I was at a loss.

My heart went back to normal pace when she walked over to the mixer and pointed to the cookie-dough laden beaters. “These. These beers. I want one.”

It became kind of funny to me then, as if my 3-year-old would really be asking for beer. But I think it’s a good reminder as well. My daughter sees and hears EVERYTHING, and I should probably be reminded of that fact on a daily basis. The environment I allow her to be in is more important than I often realize. Her mind and spirit are blank sheets of paper, and right now, I can control the pencil. Later, when she ventures into situations where other writers are free to write on that tablet, I hope that they will find a page already filled with godly training and moral absolutes. There’s no eraser.

A Dirt Cheap Riddle

What do

This

This

This

These

This

This

and This

. . . have in common?

I bought them all today at Dirt Cheap for $1 each. Unpictured are the items I already gave to Judy, which include an electric soccer/hockey goal & a heavy patio umbrella base.

Actual Value of Items (as near as I can tell from Target.com)?

1. Yoga Set ($35)

2. Blackberry case ($20)

3. Kaboost ($30)

4. Bean Bags (I bought 6 or 7) $30 each (Yes, I’m surprised with this one . . .)

5. Combi Car Seat Base ($70)

6. Espressione Machine ($400) (Jake won’t let me keep it — says I must sell it . . .)

7. 14- Game Table ($130)

Add that Judy’s base cost at least $40, and the game was $45, and I spent $13 for items that were sold at Target for $950. Not too bad for a day’s bargain shopping, you think? For you percentage lovers, that’s a 98.6% discount.

FYI — you should have seen the gluttonous snatching of items after this was announced. I am happy to announce that I even made my baby walk so that my cart could hold more treasures. Furthermore, I stooped so low as to make my child sit on the game table box to make sure no one else got it while I walked a few feet for help muscling it off the floor.

In other news (and completely unrelated to extreme bargain shopping), my husband “borrowed” my van today and just couldn’t help himself — he had to haul a 5 foot LIVE diamondback rattlesnake in it. When I inquired as to why the doors were open on the van, I was told that it smelled a bit of rattlesnake ‘musk’ and therefore needed to air out. This is not to be confused with the pleasant kinds of musk you may be familiar with. Joy. I’m just so pleased with him.

What She Said V

I thought about not publishing these, for fear people would be tired of them, but they repeatedly get rave reviews. SOO, if you’re not a fan, please skip.

Fall, 2009 — 3 yrs. old.

“I tried to wait until you came home to wipe my tears. But they did it all by themselves.”

“Luke, I spanish you.” What are you trying to say? “You know, what they say on grandma’s DVD.” banish? Punish? Vanish? Hmmmm…

“Swing low, sweet cherry-other. . .”

“The scary things will look at me under the covers and say, ‘What is that sticking out? Is it a head, or a ball?’”

After I left her with Jake to go to a meeting at church: “Dad, leave the van door open. And leave the church doors open. That way momma can hear me screaming.”

“Mom, your belly is smishing [over your belt.]” Thanks for the reassurance. My belly didn’t smish before I had kids.

“Okay, I’ll just say ‘yes’ while Dad prays.” Hmmm.. I peek, and she has her hands folded, a small smile on her face while repeatedly nodding during his entire prayer.

“Don’t put your hands in your mouth, Luke. You have teeth!”

After Uncle Steven shaved his head: “You don’t look like a man. You look like Uncle Gene.”

And, to Uncle Chris, “You don’t look like a man in that little shirt.”

Ava to Mommy: “I’m going to call you ‘Bill.’ You can still act like Mommy, but I’ll call you ‘Bill.’”

And food fun was had by all (except maybe the momma.)

Sister who can reach the cupboard + 3 (or 4) boxes of pudding = great fun and mid-afternoon bath.

You have to love how the snot created pistachio trails. . .

I started to clean it up, then figured the mess was already there. “Have fun,” says I, much to their delight.
Also included are pics of last weeks yogurt episode.

Bathtub was being re-grouted, giving Luke an opportunity to try out the sink again.

Where Are You?

“When you’re scared, Ava, you can talk to  God.” I tried to reassure my 3-year-old daughter as we lay side-by-side on her bed in the dark room.

“But, Mom – listen.” Then, as she looked at the ceiling, she loudly called out, “GOD!”

Silence met her call.

“See, Mom, He doesn’t answer me.”

 

It reminded me of Psalm 13. “How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?” “Look on me and answer, O Lord my God.”

 

I smiled as I told her that I didn’t hear him talking, either, but that I knew he was always there and could hear me, even when I don’t hear him talking back.

I hope she can learn at a very young age to join with the Psalmist David and scores of others throughout history who’ve made this their declaration: “But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, for he has been good to me.”

She did finally go to sleep, and was happy to report upon waking that the scary things had indeed left her alone in her bed. Apparently God was there after all – and I’ll bet he smiled a bit at her honest assessment of His presence.

Six Days

The neice & nephews think it might be long enough. After all, how much fun can an aunt and two kids be that many days in a row? I’ll tell you . . .

Friday: Camp out in tent & guest house, complete with fire and marshmallows

Saturday morning: Yard sales until 11:00 (this was Adrian’s favorite part)

After that: Go to Justin’s soccer game.  Then to Burger King for milk shakes to reward the patience exhibited by all.

After that (still Saturday): Go tromp around on our land and see the house site.

Yet later on Saturday: go to circus

After circus: eat pizza (compliments of grandparents, because parents are still not home)

SUNDAY: Don’t know what they do, but my kids go to their house.

MONDAY: Ida closes school, so they come after lunch. Eat three bags of popcorn for snack and play with grandma’s laptop.

TUESDAY: Still Ida, so . . . Go to Brewton to Goodwill, Dirt Cheap, Walmart, and the Flomaton Economy Shop. Squeeze in more Burger King (my blow $$ is officially GONE for the month). Buy stuff for Operation Christmas Child boxes. More popcorn.

After that: listen to cousin scream for 15-20 minutes that she chooses to stop crying. Go figure.

WEDNESDAY: Adrian gets a break, thanks to Charlie. Justin gets to go with Dad to work at church. Anna & Ava work on a centerpiece for the Weber Thanksgiving. McDonald’s lunch with Grandma for us girls (& Luke). I suggest popcorn for snack, but . . . Adrian’s not here. Anna & Ava choose popsicles. Anna gets the laptop all to herself and has such fun making videos of herself with it.

Look at all the fun we packed into 6 days and 1 night. Let me just say that my life is SOOOOOO much easier with the van. I love these kids!! We consider ourselves blessed to have 6 whole days with them. My kids will be officially in withdrawal tomorrow.

Makes You Think

I’ve heard the same sermon on the radio twice recently, and in it is this illustration from James Dobson. It really sobers me, and makes me think about the intensity that we should be focusing on this process.

“This mission of introducing one’s children to the Christian faith can be likened to a three-man relay race. First, your father runs his lap around the track, carrying the baton, which represents the gospel of Jesus Christ. At the appropriate moment, he hands the baton to you, and you begin your journey around the track. Then finally, the time will come when you must get the baton safely in the hands of your child. But as any track coach will testify, relay races are won or lost in the transfer of the baton. There is a critical moment when all can be lost by a fumble or miscalculation. The baton is rarely dropped on the back side of the track when the runner has it firmly in his grasp. If failure is to occur, it will likely happen in the exchange between generations!”

So, I want to know . . .

Was it wrong for me to stand in the shower until the hot water ran out?

My 4-month-old nephew came a 7:00 this morning, prompting an endless stream of suggestions and ideas relating to his care and play habits from my daughter. I was directed to “look at his eyes – he’s NOT sleeping,” and repeatedly begged to grant permission for him to brave the 50-degree temps and “play” in the tent on the deck.

I remembered shortly after Luke & Joshua were in morning naps that Ava had not done her “school” for the week, and the lady was coming today with the next week’s lesson. We had fun tasting sweet things, drawing slanted lines, jumping over moons, etc.  All the while, I was trying to clean up a bit, because I knew people would be there in the afternoon.

As I was braiding Ava’s hair, Luke came into the bathroom (after visiting the e-bay room, apparently) and stuffed a large piece of bubble wrap in the toilet. I tried to stop him with my foot (my hands were holding the braid in place) and he dutifully obeyed and pulled it out, dripping water . . .We packed up in the van (Joshua in the very back — bad move.  Let’s just say he may have whiplash.) and headed out the door to a 10:00 brunch. It was nice, although with my three kids in tow, I wasn’t much more than a warm-bodied child-policer. I opted to return Joshua to his perch through the back, which proved to be much easier, although I’m sure created somewhat of a spectacular sight from behind.

Luke fell asleep on the way home. Jake met me at home and we took our car to a neighbor’s to get it washed and waxed (for selling!!) I thought I had both boys sleeping when my first guest came. Hmmm. They cried intermittently, but that was only a quiet hint of the fit that was about to erupt from my daughter. Embarrassing. I finally had to give in and spank her. Sent her to bed to “sleep with Joshua.” Meanwhile, Luke had escalated his complaint to a forceful (and steady!) wail, which continued on well after I changed his poopy diaper. Finally, I gave in and held him, while still trying to have the meeting I had started an hour earlier.

Someone stopped by for Mary Kay.

I check on Ava. All was silent, but not all silence is golden. She was messing with Joshua, and neither were sleeping.

Theresa came with Ava’s next set of lesson plans.

Kids crying, running around without pants, etc.

Theresa plays with Ava while I finish my first meeting. Then, a few moments of talking with her and daughter begins screaming. We just talk louder.

I’m struggling to get the kids back in bed. Luke screams every time I put him down. Ava insists that she should not have a nap. Joshua is hungry. Mom comes.

Mom comes. She intervenes. Bless her heart, she lays in the room with the kids and keeps them calm in hopes that they’ll fall asleep.

I’m getting Joshua’s bottle ready when I hear a thud. I look toward the open door (it WAS a beautiful day!) and see a large red cardinal flopping around on my dining room floor. Jake’s dragon is salivating in its cage as it sees potential prey, and I’m am horrified. I’m sure it broke its neck, as it came to a stop under my bench and lay motionless. I called for my mommy. She came out of the room (Luke resumed screaming), looked at the bird and told me to get the dust pan. Ava strolls out to see what’s going on. Mom scoops up the bird, and we put it on the back porch table so that Gracie will not eat its carcass before Jake gets home to take care of it.

Joshua’s really hungry by now, and he chugs down the bottle in record time. I lay him on the floor, and go to change my laundry (yes, I did forget to mention that I started it first thing in the morning.) I fold one load of laundry, leaving the piles on my bed because the kids are sleeping.

Because it’s a new month,  I have to do the budget and the checkbook. Just finishing that up and Luke starts screaming. I don’t get why he has to do that immediately upon waking, but . . . He eventually wakes Ava, who has clearly not had enough sleep. The fact that Grandma took Joshua ignites a long series (and I do mean series) of fits — not just minor fits, mind you — screaming at the top of her lungs until she nearly throws up.  Luke is not to be outdone, so it’s noisy. Somewhere in all of this, the bird awoke from its stupor and flew away.

Jake came home as I was trying to finish the deposits. I decide to make a quick run to see if the bank is still opened. I leave the sound of both kids screaming my name. The bank is closed, so I come right back home. Ava is still screaming like a child possessed. After punishment and a long talk, I realize she thought I had gone to MOPS and was upset because I had left her.

We eat. We decide to take a family trip to the grocery store. All is good, until Ava decided she wanted to walk instead of ride. I gave in. Then, she became upset at something in the check-out line, and her horrified father whisked her outside. As I was putting the groceries in the van, she continued screeching, because daddy, not mommy, was strapping her in, among other things.

The phone rang while I was putting away the groceries. “Okay. No problem.” Five minutes later, I’m getting ready to start coffee when my tutee (or whatever you call the child you tutor) arrives, and I dive into the world of Algebra and World History. Jake doesn’t realize I’ve already put water in the coffee pot, adds his own water and overflows it. I discover a large, uneaten pile of bananas and green beans on the table, which duty calls me to clean up.  Okay, so NOW I finally start the Math. Ava promises she will stay in bed with no fussing, but has to get up repeatedly to check to see if I’m “still happy.” I think she really has a little crush on Kit, and refuses to fall asleep until he leaves.

Talk on the phone to my mother-in-law.

Jake goes to bed, because he has to be up early. Before crawling in, he calls me to find out what’s the deal with the clothes on the bed. Sigh. I put them away, as much as I can. I work on getting eBay items ready to mail. Why would today be the day when I have five international packages, which require three times as much work from me? Finish the packages, schedule a pick-up. Start paying bills. Run out of checks. Order checks. Order new wallet from Dave Ramsey (this has needed to be done for a while). Eat a bagel.

Tomorrow’s MOPS. I’m supposed to take food. I need to take those five international packages to the post office, an interesting chore with two kids. Jake’s working in Mobile, so he’ll be gone for a long day.

So, yes, yes, yes. I think I deserve to get into the shower, shave my legs, wash my hair and just stand there until the hot water runs out.  After all, what else is a mom to do when she finally gets a minute alone?

What She Said IV

Grandma was writing a check for mommy. Ava walked over to her with a pen and sweetly said, “Grandma, you just write ‘A-V-A’.”

“Daddy put this [Barbie] band-aid on for me. But he put her upside down. She’s getting bizzy (dizzy) from being upside-down for so long.”

At 10:00 p.m. — Mommy: “Ava, the clock says it’s past your bedtime.” Ava: “It say, ‘Rock her first,’ Momma.” How could any mom refuse?

As daddy & Ava passed a stray cat, Ava said, “Don’t hit her, Daddy. Or she will say, ‘Waaaa, Waaaa, you died me.’”

Ava wanted to go to MOPS. I told her she was coughing, and that we probably wouldn’t get to go today. She replied, “I’m swallowing the chokes back, momma,”  as she bravely attempted to keep from coughing.

Praying: (after Momma prayed for Ava to feel better) “No, Momma. I already prayed for that. You don’t have to do it again.”

After a somewhat loose, greenish production in the potty, Ava said, “It looks like I eated grass.”

Eating a juicy apple: “Why do these spit on my nose everytime?”

Luke got into the cupboard during the short amount of time I had it un-rubber-banded. I said, “Luke, what are you doing?” Ava piped up: “He’s cloroxing, Mom!” After a mad, panic-infused rush, I discovered it was only a bottle of Windex. This child makes me soooo tired.

We were at Williams’ Station Day, and Ava saw a balloon go up into the air. She subsequently saw a cloud moving quickly toward the balloon. “Daddy, the cloud is trying to catch the balloon. It doesn’t know how to catch the balloon.”